Andy Capp

Character Origins:
Andy was created by a mad scientist who lived on Mars and was dubbed "Test Tube Baby B". One day while dusting his lab with a thong, the mad scientist knocked over said test tube and it broke. The vial liquid mixed with Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle goo and PRESTO! Pacton was born.

What is under your bed?
I secretly have thousands of pictures of Roy GBP and Mackenzie Rae under my bed, but SHHH, don't tell anyone!

Occupation:
Wish I was a porn star but all I can achieve is an online virtual sex reality RPG game for 50 cents an hour.

Favourite Childhood Cartoon:
*clears throat and starts to sing* OH who lives in a pineapple under the sea? SPONGEBOB SQUARE PANTS. Absorbent and yellow and porous is he! SPONGEBOB SQUARE PANTS!!

Ideal Facial Hair:
I just wish it would stop coming in a patchy.

Song your known for:
Most known for my Oscar winning, star studded performance of "Dear Penis" by Rodney Carrington.

Song you would perform as a queen:
So badly, I want to dawn a sparkly sequence dress while singing "The pussy cat song".

Brey Ken Harts

Coming soon...

Cheri Pinktrix

Character Origin:
Cheri appeared out of a train wreck that mixed radioactive materials with a shipment of glitter and porn.

What is under your bed?
Rainbow colored carnage. Glitter, fake eyelashes, rhinestones, garters and boas.

Current Occupation:
Burlesque Dancer.

Ideal Facial Hair:
Perfectly sculpted eyebrows... WHAT? I don't have facial hair!

Song you're known for:
No one can remember the songs honey, they just remember the tits!

Song you would perform as a queen:
I am a queen trapped in a lesbian's body. It's called a bio queen or so I'm told. But if I were a queen, I would do "I won't say I'm in love" from Hercules.

Cian Mackinnon

Character Origin:
Cian was born on a sheep farm in the North of Scotland. (No jokes!)

What's under your bed?
All of my swords and piratey things of course. This may also include a wench or two.

Occupation:
Currently unemployed, I spend most of my time on Tortuga getting happily pissed and laid.

Favourite Childhood Cartoon:
Batfink! With his super sonic sonar radar.

Ideal Facial Hair:
A full beard! It's HOT and you know it!

Song you're known for:
Last Saskatchewan Pirate by The Arrogant Worms. DUH!!

Song you would perform as a queen:
Probably "Get the party started" by Pink.

Eric Erikson

Character Origin:
Mad scientist's clone of a psychiatrist.

What is under your bed?
I don't bloody remember, but I'm pretty sure it's scary!

Current Occupation:
Renegade bartender/artist.

Favourite Childhood Cartoon:
Inspector Gadget.

Ideal Facial Hair:
Something involving a goatee.

Song you're known for:
Love you till Tuesday by David Bowie.

Song you would perform as a queen:
I need a hero by Jennifer Saunders.

Eva Angel

Coming soon...

Forge

Character Origin:
Planet Sookmeekok.

What is under your bed?
Lube, nudey mags, and National Geographic.

Current Occupation:
Works for the FBI under project XXX.

Favourite Childhood Cartoon:
X-Men, Ben 10, Robot Chicken.

Ideal Facial Hair:
Goatee.

Song you're known for:
No you girls by Franz Ferdinand.

Song you would perform as a queen:
If you seek Amy by Britney Spears.

James Dean

Character Origin:
In a New York alleyway post Irish romp.

What is under your bed?
Batteries, boots, candles, and porn mags.

Current Occupation:
Hustler/Journalist

Favourite Childhood Cartoon:
X-Men, Bugs Bunny (Looney Toons)

Ideal Facial Hair:
Chin beard, side burns, soul patch.

Song you're known for:
Lover Call by Danko Jones

Song you would perform as a queen:
Tuesday Morning by Melissa Etheridge

Jeronimo Jones

Character Origin:
Regina, Saskatchewan.

What is under your bed?
Nothing. Certainly not a bunch of fashion magazines. *shifty eyes*

Current Occupation:
Dance aficionado.

Favourite Childhood Cartoon:
Fraggle Rock

Ideal Facial Hair:
I am ALL about the soul patch.

Song you're known for:
The Big Pants dance of course!

Song you would perform as a queen:
Oh honey, I AM a queen! "Roxie" from Chicago.

JJ Kage

Character Origin:
The depths of Newfoundland, in a small fishing community where there was nothing to do but listen to music or fish... I chose the first choice!

What is under your bed?
Tattoo magazine, and Fisherman Weekly.

Current Occupation:
Retired fisherman, now part time monkey trainer/full time rock star.

Favourite Childhood Cartoon:
Pinky and the Brain.

Ideal Facial Hair:
Goatee and some kickin sideburns.

Song you're known for:
Tear the House Down by The Fables.

Song you would perform as a queen:
Dirty by Christina Aguilera.

John D'Arc

Character Origin:
Johnny is the reincarnation of everyone's favourite gender-bending saint. This time, instead of fighting for King, Country and God, he's all about the ladies.

What is under your bed?
A case of hair grease and things not mentioned in polite society.

Current Occupation:
I’m a saint... what more do you want?

Favourite Childhood Cartoon:
Betty Boop was a total babe!

Ideal Facial Hair:
My bright red soul patch... why are we called "Fake Mustache" again?

Song you're known for:
James Intveld's "Doin' time for bein' young".

Song you would perform as a queen:
I tried that "being a girl" thing way back when and I ended up a little too crispy that time. Maybe I'll pass.

Josh

Character Origin:
Josh was raised by deer in the Rocky Mountains, and has only recently returned to human society.

What is under your bed?
A bunch of rocks, a parachute, handcuffs, 20 vegan granola bars and a flint stone.

Current Occupation:
Animal behavior consultant/Pixar animator.

Favourite Childhood Cartoon:
There was no television in the woods so he watched the stars pass overhead.

Ideal Facial Hair:
Something that catches the eye of good folk.

Song you're known for:
Like I love you by Justin Timberlake.

Song you would perform as a queen:
Part of your world from the Little Mermaid.

LJ Nailz

Character Origin:
L.J. was born in the early 21st century into a brood of queens and raised by the princesses. He broke away from the kingdom to become the "King of Cheese".

What is under your bed?
GIANT dust bunnies.

Current Occupation:
Carnie, floating from town to town reigning terror.

Favourite Childhood Cartoon:
Transformers and GI Joe.

Ideal Facial Hair:
5 o'clock shadow.

Song you're known for:
Def Leppard's "Pour some sugar on me".

Song you would perform as a queen:
"My heart will go on" by Celine Dion.

Mackenzie Rae

Character Origin:
The Streets.

What is under your bed?
Burglary tools and a suitcase.

Current Occupation:
Buying small countries and being rich/part time DJ.

Favourite Childhood Cartoon:
X-Men.

Ideal Facial Hair:
Soul Patch.

Song you're known for:
Either Candy shop or When you're evil.

Song you would perform as a queen:
Jessica Rabbit's Why don't you do right?

Mr. Bones

Character Origin:
New York.

What is under your bed?
Don't ask, don't tell. Trust me.

Current Occupation:
Being awesome. Srsly, its a full time job.

Favourite Childhood Cartoon:
Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles.

Ideal Facial Hair:
Bit of a shadow, or none.

Song you're known for:
Jizz in my Pants.

Song you would perform as a queen:
Shoop - Salt n' Pepa.

Sid E. Slicker

Character Origin:
Sid wandered into town one day, dazed and bewildered and holding his map upside down. He's struggling how to differentiate between streets and avenues when wandering around downtown.

What is under your bed (JJ and Eva's couch)?
Cat hair, used bus tansfers, and outdated maps.

Current Occupation:
Odd jobs around the city.

Favourite Childhood Cartoon:
The Animaniacs.

Ideal Facial Hair:
Currently redoing the goatee.

Song you're known for:
Uhh... probably Jeremiah was a bullfrog.

Song you would perform as a queen:
Just dance by Lady Gaga.

Slava Rose

Character Origin:
Born in Russia, Slava got his last name from Mme. Rose, a lady he cooked for in a fancy French restaurant. She knighted him Sir Rose instantly after the first magnificent bite of vegan smoked salmon. Rock on!

What is under your bed?
Snakes rising up with roses.

Current Occupation:
Recovering alcoholic, smooth lawyer with a dubai-ukrainian accent.

Favourite Childhood Cartoon:
Not the teletubbies that.s for sure. "Bremenskie Muzykanty" (Russian Travelling Vegabond cartoon band).

Ideal Facial Hair:
Real stubble *grins*.

Song you're known for:
Start wearing purple'.

Song you would perform as a queen:
The show must go on.

Tommy Velvetta

Coming soon...

Tony McShane

Coming soon...